


Panic

by NickyFox13



Category: Riverdale (TV 2017)
Genre: Anxiety, Gen, Mental Health Issues, Panic Attacks, Poetry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-30
Updated: 2020-03-30
Packaged: 2021-03-01 02:42:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 419
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23387572
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NickyFox13/pseuds/NickyFox13
Summary: Cheryl has a panic attack and loses control for a moment. It's terrifying.
Kudos: 2





	Panic

Needles prick Cheryl's constricting chest as  
she fights for air to enter her lungs;  
as a fighter, Cheryl is forced to act like resilient girl,  
everyone in Riverdale expects her skin of polished ivory  
to be protected by stainless steel,  
and it's expected that her heart's made of solid metal  
trimmed with gaudy velvet  
the color of the trendiest shade on the runway  
with just enough cotton to warm the ice  
from the outside looking in,  
it's pretty apparent that she's having a panic attack:  
such a vile swirl of emotions  
constrict her vision  
and it's a sharp, stabbing pain  
right in the centermost part of her chest,  
that keeps her from making a scene.  
She wants everyone to know her pain, her struggle,  
but she can't voice it correctly  
(not right now,  
maybe not ever)  
for she's too upset to focus  
on inflicting her wrath;  
experiences like these remind her of humanity that she wishes  
desperately to disappear:  
everything she held dear died alongside Jason  
and she is not whole,  
(she won't be for a while,  
maybe not ever)  
but as she breathes  
she forces the memory down into a dark place-  
Out of sight, out of mind-  
and Cheryl's forced to remember people are staring:  
she's still at Riverdale High  
and she's got obligations to fulfill,  
which isn't helping her anxiety  
but she pushes it to the side  
(it goes  
to that same dark place  
she keeps all of her emotions)  
and goes on to next period,  
hoping that no one in the halls  
remembers this scene;  
she's not a scuff mark on linoleum for everyone to gawk at  
she is a Blossom, beautiful and cruel.  
Panic is a color that shouldn't have to fit her  
but it's one that Cheryl Blossom is forced to wear  
for as long as Jason's dead  
(shivers race down her spine:   
death still frightens her enough   
to grip her heart,   
to enact power over her that she gives to no human)  
for as long as people remind her of her victimhood  
(shouldn't she act braver than her all-consuming pain?  
Surely she knows good she is at being the center attention,   
but she's gotta swallow pride to accept pity)  
for as long as Mother embellishes her martyrdom  
(this is a constant Cheryl hates enabling  
no one acts like a martyr   
more faultlessly,   
more solemnly than Mother).   
She's the queen of Riverdale High,  
and a measly panic attack shouldn't  
erase her sense of place  
(even if it does,  
for a brief, terrifying moment).


End file.
